How I met the German family

Let me start by saying that my husband and his father did not speak for years. Papa was angry at him for being with the ex.

A few months after my husband and I moved in together, we went to Germany to do the official family introduction. I specifically told the Hubs that I wanted us to sleep in separate rooms, out of respect for his parents. I mean, it was the first time they met me and I was going to be shacking up with him? No way. I was not brought up that way.

There was a lot of pain in the family. The Hubs and his sister shook hands as a greeting. It was like they were strangers. His father and he got into a huge fight. At that point, I intervened.  I calmed Hubs down and asked for his help translating. I told Papa that I knew there had been a lot of deceit but it will not be the case with me. We made a promise that we would always tell them the truth, no matter what that is. By the end of that visit, things were still cold but not as bad as when we got there.

The next time we went, there was a huge family event and things were much better. Hubs and Papa were on nicer terms. They were able to discuss financial matters without screaming. Papa even asked me to be the official photographer for the event. Afterwards, we reviews the pictures together and got some printed out. He was very happy with us, but still a bit distant.

This past summer, we went again. Boy, how things have changed. Hugs and kisses all around. No more hand shakes at all. The boys (nephews) are getting a  little bigger and it’s nice. We got to do so much with them. Hubs and Papa were like best friends. Mama has always been sweet. She is a true angel. I understood a lot of what they were saying, even if I could not speak too much. We even took a short trip with Mama and Papa to Dachau and Munich. Papa was like a kid. He wanted to show me everything there is to see.

They had just purchased a very nice furnished apartment in Limburgerhof (which is the town next to theirs-Neuhofen) and that is where we stayed. Papa kept on pointing out how nice and comfortable the apartment was to us. Kinda to try and convince us to move (he made other little insinuations here and there). It was truly adorable. Hi sister, on the other hand, was very upfront about it. She just straight out told us that she wanted us to live there and that we should move soon. She has been taking intensive English and teaching the kids (I sent them some books, as well). We have all been closely in touch ever since. Thank goodness for Skype!

Two weekends ago, during my in-laws’ bi-weekly call, my husband mentioned to them that I was doing good with my German classes. My mother-in-law wanted to say hello, so I spoke with her in German. While I was speaking with her, my father-in-law was telling her that he wanted to talk also. He was so excited that we could communicate better. He asked me why I was studying the language so intensively. I told him it was because we were moving back next year for sure. He knew we were thinking about it, but not that it was a sure thing. He was so happy. He said they would celebrate that night.

This weekend, I got a call from my sister-in-law. This in nothing new, we talk all the time. She is more like a real sister to me. She wanted to know if they (her, her husband and the kids) could come for Easter 2016. She wasn’t sure if we would be gone by then. I told her that it would be perfect. We can move right after they leave. She can help me sort what to take and what to leave behind. Why is this a huge deal? She has never been to the US. She is afraid of flying.

She also mentioned that their parents are coming this year and they will call us this coming weekend to sort our the schedule. I can’t even begin to express how happy we are with all this.


About Frau Frey

Happily married to my best friend. I have two wonderful children, one 28 and one 19. The purpose of this blog is to chronicle the changes we are making in the next 15 months. Our daughter's going away to college and our move back to my husband's home in Germany.
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